As I said last time, I hate cigarettes, smoking and the
medical tragedies that result. I never smoked, nor did
my wife.
So, why do I have three grown kids who smoke?
Bad Dad: 10 Keys to Regaining Trust (get it at
http://www.Bad-Dad.com/baddad_dp.htm), the
chronicle of transformation from angry, self-centered
fathers to calm, caring dads, demonstrates how many of
us create kids with no support or acceptance at home.
Why do they smoke? It’s not because the cigarette is so
wonderful, but because people who smoke have a common
bond with other smokers automatically and without
effort. As a 14-year old who can’t find an entree into
a new group, “bumming” or offering a cigarette creates
immediate acceptance.
Only those who need “immediate” acceptance will go that
route. And you only need “immediate” acceptance if you
don’t get consistent acceptance at home.
So, I’m telling on myself it’s no secret. Ask my kids
and they’ll quickly confirm it: I was not very
accepting, nurturing or, well. . .fatherly.
But, if the ever increasing number of teen smokers is
an indication, I’m not alone. According to the Centers
for Disease Control:
* Twenty-two percent of all high school students smoke
(split evenly between boys and girls).
* Eight percent of middle school students smoke
* Of new smokers, 90 percent, or 3000 per day, are
teens
* And 90 percent of all adult smokers say they started
as teens
Are you beginning to see a vicious circle here Get
‘em while they’re young and keep ‘em till they’re dead!
How do we as parents stop the cycle? To recap just
one or two of the many tips highlighted in the report:
* Schedule time. Build a relationship. Kids will not
listen to you when you discourage the smoking habit if
they don’t trust you to begin with.
* Know your child’s friends. It’s pretty easy to see
who the rotten apples are. Do your best to encourage
healthy relationships without threatening current
friendships.
* Don’t smoke. We’ll talk more about this in the next
installment, but for goodness sake, don’t tell you kid
that it’s bad to smoke while you sneak outside for a
quick drag. If you can’t stop, how do you expect them
to take you seriously?
****************************************************
David Perdew, author of “Bad Dad: 10 Keys to Regaining
Trust,” is a father and former Bad Dad. Claim your free
Special Report — Teen Smoking: Is Your Teen Committing
Suicide Slowly with Cigarettes? at
=> http://www.Bad-Dad.com/srts.htm
****************************************************
Read personal stories of the search for inner peace in
a not-so-peaceful world at
=> http://www.WorldWantingPeace.com/ar.htm
Everyone wants Peace. Today’s a good day to start.
****************************************************
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